Saturday, December 12, 2009

The morning after the day before

Thank you all so much for the kind messages, e-mails, comments and thoughts and prayers.

It couldn't have gone any better than it did. Well, I guess I *could* have won the lottery too, but lets not get carried away now.

We dropped the girls off at the farm in the morning, expecting it to be for a couple hours then Rene would come pick them back up. Then we got to the hospital and they put an enormous gown on me and some funky slipper socks which I *hope* I was supposed to keep because I sort of did. Heck it costs thousands of dollars, the least they can do is throw in a free pair of socks, right? They started the iv etc and everyone loved cooing at Turtle who was grinning and saying, "yeah" to everyone and soaking up the attention. He is just like his Daddy! It was wonderful to have them both there. I'm such a nervous wreck without my husband and I feel naked without my kids. So at least I could still be in mommy mode which helped me feel authentic. So a huge thank you to Laura Chisholm for her awesome friendship and willingness to put up with my kids for so long, and make gingerbread houses with them and let them wreck your house and feed them.

Rene decided he didn't want to leave my side so he called Laura and asked her to keep them for longer.

Everyone was making preparations for me to spend the night, telling me where my room would be and getting ready to move our belongings etc. The Dr had acted like he was stretching it to do me a favor by making it only one night. I think he expected more complications because of my weight. More issues with the anesthesia and more layers to cut through so more potential issues there. But he didn't anticipate that I had an army of prayer warriors on my side.

They wheeled me through to the big creepy white and blue room full of machines and an insane number of busy people all making preps for my surgery, and I got scared and said lots of stupid things. Thankfully I had my glasses off so I was blind as a bat which helped me stay sort of oblivious. Soon I was fast asleep and the next hour or so is hazy. They gave me some morphine and hydrocodone so I felt pretty good.

I felt even better when Rene and Turtle came back in to brighten up the room. And they told me it went surprisingly well, and since i had a note on the papers to say I was *depserate* to go home as soon as possible they could get my discharge papers ready and send me home! Woohoo. So no sleeping in the hospital alone for me.

I came home, woozy and sleepy, then got insomnia. Oh well. Kaya was almost disappointed to see me because she had prepped herself to miss me and made me beautiful cards and had me take these photos before I left so she'd remember me.



It was a bit anticlimactic for her I think. But Lana and Zoe were excited to see me and cuddle in bed and watch a movie while Rene cooked ordered supper. And I know Rene, who has a sore head and is getting a cold, appreciated having me here to help with Turtle who didn't do a lot of sleeping last night. I hate to think of him being on his own dealing with a non sleeping babe who wants nothing but his mama.

And even better news...I'm still holding my breath about it, but we've been told we *may* not have the preexisting conditions clause because of a group policy issue. And we may be able to get financial assistance from the hospital because of our income level. That would be wonderful.. especially since the hospital website states these surgeries can cost between $8000-$30000 which is an unimaginable amount of money. We'll see how that works out.

I'm not in too much pain, mostly discomfort. But compared to the gallbladder pain I was having before this is a breeze. I'll be on meds for a few days and will take it easy. But I'm HOME! I have my weekend with my family! I am so thrilled. It's over and done with and wasn't too bad at all. I'm sure it has everything to do with your prayers.


A big holla to Laura Chisholm for winning the day.

Have a great weekend, peeps.




Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Scarecrow, I think I'm going to miss you most of all

My heart is heavy.

I've been dealing with really bad pain in my upper abdomen for 9 days now. It's been very hard to function, especially when Rene isn't home. They did a few tests and have determined that my gallbladder "don't work a hoot" were the surgeon's words. So I will be having surgery on Friday to have it removed.

Firstly, I hate hospitals. I am scared to death thinking about it all. I will be so far out of my comfort zone. My stomach is in knots thinking about it. I had a homebirth to avoid going to hospital. I am a homebody and too much time away from home makes me crazy.

I'm very nervous about the financial implications of this. We are on a preexisting conditions clause with the insurance just now and they know this is a preexisting condition because I was tested last year. So this is going to really make us suffer and I have no idea how we will manage it.

Mostly though, I'm torn up thinking about the time away from the kids. I've to be there for 11.30am on Friday. Rene will be dropping me off. I have to at least spend one night and then it depends on how I am doing. I've hardly been away from Turtle and Zoe for a few hours never mind all night. He is still nursing frequently through the night. I'll need to take a breast pump with me so I don't get mastitis.

I am going to miss them so bad. They are not even allowed to visit me because kids under 14 are not allowed on the patient wards because of risk of swine flu. :(

I so badly want to call the whole thing off. But then the pain strikes up again and I know I can't cope. It's really kicking my butt. And I can't live on narcotics for the rest of my life. As wonderful as they are, it's kind of difficult to stay awake, never mind homeschool when I'm drugged up.

Anyway, wish me luck. I'm sure they'll all cope but I will be so lonely and will miss them so incredibly much. I can't wait to get back home asap. Prayers that it will go well and that I can recover fast to get home soon would be much appreciated.




Tot Talk Tuesday





It's been snowing here in Nebraska! Plenty. And it doesn't show signs of stopping (I've brought some corn for poppin'). You'll be singing that song all day now.

We have the perfect hill in our back yard for sledding. So we went out yesterday. It was a bit of an ordeal actually, finding all the winter coats, snow trousers and snow boots, finding gloves and putting them on everyone, then getting them to keep them on while I kitted up the siblings. It took at least an hour to get everyone weather proof.

Then when we were out, Turtle hated the snow and particularly hated being all puffed up in layers of clothing and he screamed bloody murder. So we spent about 5 minutes out there before we had to head back in for hot chocolate (ala Kaya).

Anyway while we were getting ready to go out, Zoe was getting very excited and chanting,

"I want to go to bogganing. This is my bogganing and that one is Kaya's bogganing."




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Monday, December 7, 2009

This week on ikaya

Enjoy the Amazing adventures of Potato Boy, Uncle Doug's backwards talking and well...you know we have to embarrass Daddy somehow. Watch and see what he did this week.